Can't Let You Go: A 'What If' Story
by bionic4ever
Summary: CLYG1: What if Michael Marchetti didn't accept his transfer peacefully, and was driven insane by unrequited love? Warning: this one is weird!
1. Chapter 1

**Can't Let You Go**

Chapter One

Jaime Sommers sat up in her hospital bed, looking out the window and feeling very much alone. She was trying to decide if she might actually be better off that way. It seemed to her that when she let herself develop feelings for a man, she brought him nothing but heartache and pain. She was 27 years old, and had only experienced true, deep feelings for a man twice in her life. One, she couldn't acknowledge and the other, she couldn't remember.

That afternoon, she had been forced to say goodbye to Michael, a young doctor on Rudy's medical team. He'd been responsible for bringing her back from death, and it was hard to say whose feelings had developed first, but there was a deep, passionate (mostly unspoken) love between them. Because he was still one of her doctors, they'd both tried valiantly not to let it happen, and to hide it once it did. But every look that passed between them betrayed them with nearly visible sparks like smoldering embers about to burst into full flames.

It hadn't taken Rudy long to figure out what was happening between the young doctor and his patient. He knew talking to Michael wouldn't be enough; things had grown too intense, too quickly. Rudy arranged for his protege to be transferred immediately to another of the team's facilities in Colorado Springs, away from temptation; away from Jaime. Just in time, too. When he sought Michael out to tell him, he found the young doctor in Jaime's room, holding his patient much too close for a friendly hug. The two practically jumped apart, but Rudy was not naive. He knew what would inevitably happen if things were allowed to continue. Michael protested and argued vehemently but Rudy stood firm. Within hours, Michael was gone.

Before Michael, before Jaime had become gravely ill and turned into what she called 'the perpetual patient', there had been...Steve. Their lives had been connected in one way or another for over 20 years. They'd been best friends, childhood sweethearts, and had come very close to marriage just over a year ago. Jaime felt nothing short of robbed by the amnesia she'd suffered. It had stolen away most of her memories, her love for Steve and - Steve himself. His love for Jaime was as strong as ever, but, reluctant to cause her any further pain and also suffering considerably from the loss, he had stayed away.

Jaime was alone. She still had Oscar, of course. People who saw her with her former-and-future boss smiled, believing them to be a couple in love. He was her mentor and she, his surrogate daughter, but..._love?_

"Someone sure looks deep in thought." Rudy had come to check on his patient. When she turned to look at him, he was alarmed by the extreme pallor of her skin and the tears in her eyes. "You having that pain again, Honey?" he asked, pressing a hand to her forehead. Normal.

"No. Just...feeling sorry for myself, I guess."

"Michael?"

Jaime shook her head. "Well, maybe a little. Mostly, life in general."

"Anything ol' Doc Rudy can help with?" She shook her head again, more slowly this time, still struggling to hold back the tears. Rudy tucked the blankets around her more securely. "I have news that might cheer you up. Steve called a little while ago, asking if it was ok to come and see you. Is it, or are you needing some alone time right now?"

"No - that's fine."

"Good - that's what I told him. Thought you could use a friend." Jaime smiled at him, her tears forgotten.

"Excuse me...Rudy?" Linda stood at the door, an odd expression on her face. "You have a phone call."

"Who is it?"

Linda dodged the question, which was very unusual. "You...um...need to take this one."

"Alright - I'm coming." He turned to Jaime. "You get some rest now, Honey. I'll see you in the morning."

He and Linda walked down to his office together, not speaking again until they were behind the closed door. "It's Colorado Springs," Linda told him. "They want to know why you decided not to send Michael Marchetti today."  
"What?" Rudy's face grew pale with confusion. "Thank you, Linda," he said, picking up the phone.

While Rudy was on the phone with his collegues in Colorado, Jaime received a phone call of her own.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Baby - it's me."

"Michael? How was your flight?"

"A little bumpy, but ok. Colorado's so far away, though. I wish I was there right now, holding you."

"Me, too," she said softly. "I miss you so much."

"I never got to tell you this, Jaime, but I love you - more than life itself."

Jaime felt a little uncomfortable now. He'd crossed the doctor/patient line in voicing those words, and that particular phrasing, from a physician, also made her feel vaguely afraid.

"Jaime, I'm gonna try and call you again tomorrow. Do me a favor, Baby: don't tell anyone you talked to me, ok? Rudy'd have me fired and roasting on a spit over an open flame."

"Ok..." she answered, very uneasily.

"I love you, Baby."

"Goodnight, Michael."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

First thing in the morning, even before checking on Jaime, Rudy placed another call to Colorado Springs. There'd still been no word from, or sign of, Michael. Rudy's next call was automatic. "Get me Oscar Goldman."

The OSI Director shared Rudy's growing sense of alarm, and he assured his friend he'd be at the hospital within the hour.

Rudy found his patient even paler and weaker than the night before. In spite of the strong sedative she'd been given, Jaime had barely slept at all, and the only part of her breakfast she'd even touched was her juice. At this hour of the morning, she was usually up, dressed and either on the sun porch or down the hall, chatting with the nurses. Instead, she was lying listlessly in her bed, barely seeming to notice that Rudy had joined her.

"Jaime? Are you feeling sick, Honey?"

"No...not really."

"Any pain?"  
"Uh-uh. Just...tired. Maybe a little homesick. I don't remember all that much about home, but it wasn't a hospital."

Rudy finished taking her vital signs and smiled at her. "All normal. Just be patient; this won't be forever."

"I know," she said softly, closing her eyes.

Rudy headed down to his office to wait for Oscar. Jaime tossed and turned restlessly in an uneasy sort of twilight sleep. Steve, who had just missed crossing paths with Rudy, sat quietly at her bedside, watching her. He knew her well enough to guess that she was in the throes of a nightmare, and he debated whether or not to wake her. She began to thrash around more wildly and he reached out to gently rouse her, but she woke on her own instead, her eyes snapping open, a look of pure terror on her face.

"No," she whispered, as she struggled back to full consciousness.

Steve took her hand and spoke to her soothingly. "Jaime? It's me, Sweetheart."

"Steve?"

"You were having a bad dream. You're ok; you're safe. You wanna talk about it?"

"I...don't remember..." she said hazily. "I was running...had to run..."

"From what, Jaime? What scared you so badly?"

"Not sure..." Her eyelids felt so heavy and she was completely drained, exhausted. "...so tired..."

Steve touched a hand to her face. "You wanna go back to sleep?" Jaime nodded. "I'll go talk to Rudy, and then come back later, ok?" Jaime didn't answer; she was already completely out. The figure in her bathroom stood silently, waiting.

Rudy and Oscar sat in Rudy's office, discussing the situation and what it might mean. Oscar had issued an APB on the missing doctor. Rudy called the nurses' station to request Jaime's chart.

"Excuse me?" he said when the nurse came back on the line. "Is she positive? Send her down here immediately, please." An very frightened young nurse appeared in the doorway seconds later. Steve was right behind her. Rudy motioned them both in. "Denise," Rudy began, "Please tell us what you told Linda." The nurse looked at the serious faces around her and was too scared to speak. "Honey, you aren't in any trouble, but we need to know exactly what happened."

"The other doctor came and took the chart about an hour ago," she said tremulously.

"Which 'other doctor'?" Steve asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"The young, cute one. Marchetti."

"Oh, God - no..." Steve uttered involuntarily.

"I...I'm sorry -"

"Denise, Honey, you didn't do anything wrong. We appreciate your telling us. I need you to do me a favor: let everyone know that if they see him again, they are to call Security and then notify me right away." Denise nodded and was gone.

Rudy made one more call. "Security?" His voice was strong and urgent. "I want the entire building on lock-down immediately. I need you to do a thorough search for Doctor Michael Marchetti. Personnel should have a picture. If you don't find him, look again. And I need an armed guard outside my patient's room as soon as you can get one up here. Thank you."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

While events in Rudy's office unfolded, Jaime was experiencing some drama of her own. She was awakened suddenly by a hand pressed tightly over her mouth. "It's me, Baby," Michael said, very quietly. "I need you not to scream, ok?" Jaime nodded, terrified by the strange, unfamiliar gleam in his eyes. He took his hand from her mouth.

Jaime forced her voice to remain calm and quiet. "Michael, what are you doing here? I thought -"

"I came back for you, Jaime. I love you."

"Does Rudy know you're here?" Every nerve cell in Jaime's body was screaming for her to run, but her limbs felt like cement and she was just so tired...

"No," Michael answered. "Or maybe he does know by now. Doesn't matter, though. We'll be long gone before anyone comes looking."

Jaime watched in horror as he removed a syringe from his pocket. When he reached for her arm, she finally found the strength to move - _fast._ She was almost to the door when Michael caught her by her hair and swung her around, sending her flying in the opposite direction. She hit the wall in the far corner, hard, and slumped to the floor.

She shook off the pain and dizziness instantly. This was no longer Michael, whom she had grown to love. She was now up against a vicious stranger, and she was fighting for her life. She raised one foot as he came toward her; one bionic kick to the kneecap and this would all be over. With all of her remaining strength behind it, her foot made the connection. Nothing happened. Michael remained on his feet, grinning at her.

"Oh - I should probably tell you," he said, laughing at her, "Your bionics are basically useless."

"You...drugged...me..."

"You had me a little worried when you didn't eat your breakfast, but at least you drank your juice like a good little girl." He reached for Jaime with the syringe poised and ready.

"Why are you doing this?" she asked, trying to stall for time. Where was everyone?

"We're supposed to be together, Jaime. Rudy had no right to interfere. I can see they've already turned you against me, but you'll learn to love me again. After all, we've got forever now." He grabbed her left wrist and held it firmly, hurting her.

Jaime squirmed and wiggled as much as she could, determined to at least make it harder for him, to buy just a little more time...

"Michael, please - stop and look at what you're doing."

"You've gotta trust me, Baby. We're gonna have a great life together, just the two of us. We'll be so happy." His face grew angry. "Stop struggling, Jaime. I don't wanna hurt you, but one way or the other, this _will_ happen. And someday you'll thank me."

He plunged the needle deep into her arm. Jaime was able to get out one blood-curdling scream: "**NO**!" Then her world went black.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

The three men in Rudy's office heard Jaime's scream and, having just formulated a plan, sprang into action. Rudy was first to head to Jaime's room. His heart sank when he opened the door and saw Michael with a wild look in his eyes and Jaime's limp body in his arms. Rudy couldn't tell from the doorway if she was breathing. Had Michael already done the unthinkable?

"Michael, Son...what are you doing? What happened?"

"I love her. You have no right to keep us apart. Now no one can can keep us apart - ever again."

"Son, you can't take someone away by force and make them love you. Now, if you really love her -"

"Of course I do. Can't you see that? Can't you see what I'm doing for her?"

"I see that you're confused and hurting, Michael," Rudy said carefully. "If you really love her, show me by putting her back in her bed so we can take care of her. You and I can go down to my office and sort this all out." Rudy took a cautious step toward Michael and Jaime, his hand held out as though offering peace.

"No!" Michael backed away, removed a second syringe from his pocket and held the tip to Jaime's neck. "Don't make me do this, Rudy," he snarled, his eyes growing dark and menacing. "She's only resting now, but if you try and stop us, I swear to God, no one will have her - ever!" He was so pre-occupied with his tirade that he didn't hear the window behind him sliding open. Steve had planned to just storm in and take Michael down, but the needle at Jaime's neck changed things. He moved across the ledge and stood off to one side of the window, out of sight.

Michael moved toward the door and was blocked again, this time by Oscar. "You know I can't let you leave, Michael, unless you put Jaime down first."

Michael laughed. "Right - you'd let me leave if I give her up? I doubt it. I won't get two feet out the door before one of your sharpshooters takes me out. Not buying it. Sorry."

"If you try to leave this building with Jaime, they have my order to shoot," Oscar told him. "So there are two ways this can play out, Michael. Leave the building - alive - without Jaime, or you don't leave at all."

"Threats only work if someone's afraid of them, Goldman, and I'm not. My love - our love - is strong enough that I will risk my life to be with this woman. You need to get out of the way, _now."_

Silently, Steve leapt through the window , grabbed the arm that held the needle and jerked it back, hard. Holding tightly onto Michael's arm, he pried the needle from his hand and gave it to Rudy, then moved in front of the now-former-doctor and took Jaime from Michael's arms into his own.

Jaime moaned softly as Steve carried her down the hall to a different room (she didn't need to see whatever happened to Michael) and laid her gently in the bed. He brushed the hair from her face and tenderly stroked her forehead as she slowly opened her eyes.

"Welcome back," he said, his entire face smiling at her.

"Steve...I was so scared..." She sat up and threw her arms around him in relief. He held her close, rubbing her back to comfort her, until her trembling finally ceased.

Jaime didn't know who the future might find her with; maybe Steve, or Oscar, or someone entirely new. Or maybe (she always did have an independent streak) just herself. There was one thing she knew for certain: at this precise moment in time, these arms felt pretty damn good.

END


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